The Day After Christmas
Twas the day after Christmas, and all through the house,
Every creature was hurtin' even the mouse.
The toys were all broken, their batteries dead.
Santa passed out, with some ice on his head.
Wrapping and ribbons just covered the floor,
While upstairs the family continued to snore.
And I in my T-shirt, new Reeboks and jeans,
I went into the kitchen and started to clean.
When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from the sink to see what was the matter.
Away to the window I flew like a flash,
Tore open the curtains and threw up the sash.
When what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But a little white truck, with an oversized mirror.
The driver was smiling, so lively and grand.
The patch on his jacket said "U.S. POSTMAN."
With a handful of bills, he grinned like a fox.
Then quickly he stuffed them into our mailbox.
Bill after bill, after bill, they still came.
Whistling and shouting he called them by name:
"Now Dillard's, now Broadway's, now Penny's and Sears
Here's Robinson's, Levitz's and Target's and Mervyn's.
To the tip or your limit, every store, every mall,
Now chargeaway—chargeaway – chargeaway all!"
He whooped and he whistled as he finished his work.
He filled up the box, and then turned with a jerk.
He sprang to his truck and he drove down the road,
Driving much faster with just half a load.
Then I heard him exclaim with great holiday cheer,
"ENJOY WHAT YOU BOUGHT.......
YOU'LL BE PAYING ALL YEAR!"
A Kensington Night Before Christmas
Twas the night before Christmas, and through our Kensington community
Not a complaint was heard, there appeared just pure unity.
The homeowners were nestled all snug in their beds,
No worries of street parking, speeding or such bothering their heads,
And the board of directors in their home beds, and I in mine too,
Had just settled down after reviewing the Kensington 2023 dues,
When out in my yard there arose such a clatter,
I sprang to my porch to see what was the matter.
Away to the front door I flew like a flash,
Only to see neighbors with several gripes to again rehash.
I couldn’t figure out in the dark of the night
Exactly what they thought gave them the right,
But I knew from my time on the homeowner’s board,
Our meetings these neighbors had mostly ignored,
Then in a flash I noticed a visitor,
Who tried to join this group of inquisitors
He wore a red fur coat over an ample belly, and
His hearty laugh made it shake as it were jelly,
His smile quickly faded as they all turned away,
They told him that tenants had nothing to say,
The jolly man disappeared as quickly as he came here,
Amid the sound of our six wandering Kensington deer!
In a moment came another neighbor, without much ado,
He arrived with a viewpoint needed and new,
I knew in a flash it was, my neighbor from Wembley Drive,“Nick,”
He knew what was needed and he brought it up quick,
He exclaimed “Now, Members! now, Neighbors! Now, Bylaws and Covenant,
Please read the rules before bringing your comments and judgements,
Now back to your homes, and back to your Kensington castles,
Please, just for tonight, have a cease to your KOA hassles”
He said “you by choice bought into this community,
which works at its best when all live in unity,”
Remember that your board serves you for free,
So how about joining a committee – or three.
Amidst headshakes and handshakes, my front yard then cleared,
I wished them all Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year.